Many of us kick off the New Year with the high expectations we have for ourselves…. This is going to be my year… I’m getting rid of all of the bullish*t in my life…. I’m going to eat healthy… I’m going to stop drinking alcohol… I’m going to be more productive… etc. It’s the time of year most of us feel is the perfect time to set our goals and try to become a better version of ourselves.
For me personally, the New Years transformation doesn’t always work out so smoothly. I woke up on New Years Day still a little drunk, having a way-too-long text conversation with my ex-boyfriend, eating pizza from the night before and within the first week… I began stressing myself out over school/internships, my face broke out (this never even happens to me!) and I locked myself out of my website for 10 days by attempting to change the URL (on that note, we will be darlamagazine.com forever haha).
I woke up on January 1st, 2015 feeling like the same person I was on the morning of December 31st, 2014 (possibly even less like myself) — unlucky, with a slight Henney hangover, way too caring personality and way too bad eating habits…. And if you also entered the New Year the same as you were the day before then, well, don’t trip.
Change isn’t something that is going to happen over night… Especially when it comes to breaking habits and achieving success.
Kind of like that question our older family members always ask us on our birthdays: “How does it feel to be a year older?” We might give a cute, insightful answer but in actuality, what we’re really thinking is: “No different than I felt yesterday.”
Change is constant. Every day we evolve a little and grow in different ways… All of which can’t be forced to happen on a specific date, such as a birthday or a New Year.
Don’t consider yourself to be a failure if, with only 18 days in to the New Year, you have already broken your resolutions and haven’t experienced any measurable growth yet… Because change and growth both take time.
When I look back on 2014 as a whole, I can see how much I have changed and in what ways. My life as a friend, student, writer, daughter, sister, etc. is dramatically different than what it was a year ago… But not very different than it was 19 days ago.
Things in our lives change so naturally that we rarely even notice it happening… But it’s when we set dates and times to become “different” or “better” that we begin to feel as though we are not doing good enough. And for this reason, I think it’s best for us to go against the typical way of making resolutions or setting goals. Instead, we should set our intentions by looking at the bigger picture.
In 2015, I want to become an even better version of myself. I want to work everyday to achieve my goals (and I understand/accept that some days will allow for more progress than others). I want to love myself and be good to others and spread and receive positive energy. I want to learn more about the world and become more aware of what is happening in it, and why. I want to appreciate my life the way it is, as I know it will not be the same when I look back on it in 2016. I want to find time to do all of the things that make me happy — like write and read and laugh and kiss and eat tacos…. And I want to find time to discover new things that make me happy as well.
The other day, I was alone walking in Brooklyn and I approached a sign that read, “2015 Year Of The Taco”…. And even though I didn’t belong in Brooklyn at the time (it was a random, spur of the moment trip)… Tacos are one of my favorite things about life, which made this sign super relevant.
I’m pretty sure it was placed right outside of a Mexican restaurant… But before I even looked around to see why it was there, I translated the message from “Year Of The Taco” to “Year Of Everything You Love.” What are the odds that I’d come across this sign, ever? It was obviously placed there for a bigger purpose than marketing (haha).
To me, this sign was one from the universe letting me know that I was exactly where I was supposed to be. Still on the right path, even though I felt out of place and things in my life weren’t going as smoothly as I would have liked them to halfway through January.
This one random moment made me realize that instead of forcing change to occur at a specific time, it’s best to just trust the signs that we are already on the right path. Through the good and bad days and through our negative and positive attributes… We are who we are and we are where we are in life for a reason.
Be confident, keep living and everything will fall into place naturally.
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